A Perfect Storm

Rick Perry has withdrawn from the presidential campaign. Touted by our political media as a formidable opponent when he entered the race, he turned out to be, as many have said, George Bush without the brains. [That, Anneliese, is a good example of "scarcasm."] It seemed Perry couldn't open his mouth without needlessly insulting a foreign country, most recently Turkey.

In his withdrawal speech, Rick Perry endorsed Newt Gingrich.

Even before Perry's withdrawal, Newt was riding a rocket ship in the South Carolina polls, and now leads Mitt Romney.

But Newt will get no sleep, because tonight at 10:35 CST ABC News will broadcast an interview with his second wife, Marianne, in which she will claim Newt tried to talk her into an open marriage.

“I said to him, ‘We’ve been married a long time,’” Marianne Gingrich says, in an excerpt from the interview released Thursday morning by ABC News. “And he said, ‘Yes but you want me all to yourself. Callista doesn’t care what I do.’”

Oh my!

Meanwhile, we're starting to get a notion of why Mitt Romney said he might release his tax returns in April. He apparently wants to release only his 2011 tax returns, which have not been prepared yet. We won't be able to see what he did with his money in prior years, for which returns have already been filed.

What does it matter? ABC reports:

For weeks, Romney has cited a desire for privacy as his reason for not sharing his tax returns -- a gesture of transparency that is now expected from presidential contenders.

"I can tell you we follow the tax laws," he said recently while on the campaign trail in New Hampshire. "And if there's an opportunity to save taxes, we like anybody else in this country will follow that opportunity."

Uh-oh.

But tax experts tell ABC News there are other reasons Romney may not want the public viewing his returns. As one of the wealthiest candidates to run for president in recent times, Romney has used a variety of techniques to help minimize the taxes on his estimated $250 million fortune. In addition to paying the lower tax rate on his investment income, Romney has as much as $8 million invested in at least 12 funds listed on a Cayman Islands registry. Another investment, which Romney reports as being worth between $5 million and $25 million, shows up on securities records as having been domiciled in the Caymans.

Official documents reviewed by ABC News show that Bain Capital, the private equity partnership Romney once ran, has set up some 138 secretive offshore funds in the Caymans.

Poor Rick Santorum, who advocates assassinating Russian scientists, is finally declared the winner of the Iowa caucuses – just in time to hear Perry endorse Newt. The news about the open marriage interview broke last night, so Perry already knew about it, but endorsed Newt anyway. Consider that.

But don't count Santorum out yet! The Republicans are bat**** crazy, and there's no telling who their next messiah will be.

Hey, there's always Ron Paul.

Now, to make this absolutely delicious, there's another Republican debate tonight! Who will rabies strike next?

Not to be missed. Oh, what a great idea it was for the Republicans to have a debate every 2 or 3 days!

And the South Carolina primary is Saturday.

Update: Couldn't watch the debate for more than 25 minutes. First question was to Gingrich about the interview with his second wife. Gingrich was shocked! shocked! that the CNN moderator would lead off the debate with such a question. It was all about the media attacking Republicans and protecting President Obama. Red meat for the crowd.

Republicans are bat**** crazy.